One of my dear friends talks about looking for the ‘blessing next to the wound’. When you have experienced a pregnancy that you weren’t sure of, whether you chose abortion or childbirth, issues may come up that have been problems for you for a long time. The blessing could be that you take the opportunity to invest some time in yourself and heal some of those old problems.
Many of us (especially women) have difficulty spending time and money on our emotional issues. It might seem too hard or scary; or we just think we’ve been able to deal with it all our lives, so why does it matter? If it is only your own happiness and wellbeing at stake, that might make sense. But if you have children, it is painful to realize that you will pass all those same problems down to them if you do not have the courage to break the pattern.
Many women who have difficulty with pregnancy and abortion are experiencing what is called Co-Dependency. Take a little time to research this, and you may see yourself and your life in some of the descriptions. Although we are grow-ups on the outside, we are often immature little kids on the inside. Things are much harder than they have to be if you have a 5 year old trying to drive the car of your life!
There are many therapists who are skilled at helping you do the work I call ‘growing up inside’. I think you will find it is well worth it, and you’ll wonder why you didn’t start your recovery years ago!